Long distance relationship :No one said being in a long distance relationship with your significant other would be easy, even the 'close' distance relationships are not that easy.
Alot of people that are in long distance relationships didn't choose to be in one (no one likes to be apart from the ones they love) but due to some circumstances like works, family relocations it got to happen.
I know a lot of people who chose to end their relationships because of distance, not that i'm trying to judge anybody because people have reasons for making certain decisions. But ending a relationship shouldn't be the only solution to making a long distance relationship work because distance means nothing when your significant other means everything.
To make a long distance relationship work, you both have to make a some little adjuments or compromise; take it as a sacrifice or a storm which will some day become calm.
Well for those who are already in a long distance relationship or those who are planning to be in one, here are my NOT-SO-STEVE HARVEY suggestions to making a long distance relationship work.
Communication is the key to every successful long distance relationship. Staying in contact, which is what communication means shows a lot of care and concern.
Try your best to keep the communication 99.9% on because lack of it makes people to grow apart even without knowing it. To achieve this, you have to follow certain DOs listed below:
- Do call at least once a day despite any schedule.
- Do try and talk about little important things.
- Do text if can't call.
- Do have good reasons for not calling or texting, this shows that you actually care about their feelings.
- Do have good reasons for not taking their calls because it shows you haven't lost interest in them and that they are not bothering you.
- Do initate a lot of video calls. Visual is good, thanks to technology: WhatsApp Messenger, Facebook and Imo chat; now comes with free video calling.
2. Visit often if you can.
Just like how staying in touch helps in a long distance relationship so does your significant other seeing you in flesh and blood once in a while.
Try making out time from your too busy schedule to visit one another. This might not be possible if you live in different countries, but if you can then do it.
3. A little understanding helps.
Know that your partner is human, don't hold grudges for long when you know that you too can make mistakes too. Especially if they don't call. That is why i mentioned above that you should always have a good reason for not calling or texting. Even when your partner doesn't have a good reason for their actions, don't be scared or start to assume the worst. Give them time and space because your partner might still be adjusting to the fact that you guys are far away from each other.
Things you should do in such situations :
- Do show them your full time support by letting them know that.
- Do respect their decision of wanting some space for a while but not longer than a week.
- Don't be irrational or jump into conclusions.
- When you think your partner is ready, try and get to know their reasons for not wanting to keep in touch for a while making sure you choose your words carefully to avoid hurting their feelings.
- Do tell them how their decision made you feel.
4. Trust is essential.
Yes, trust is another key to make this work but still the one thing that make people scared of going into a long distance relationship.
How to do you achieve this?
- Do let them know those you roll with.
- Don't ever take your partner for granted or things that concerns them.
- Don't try to make every discussion about you, give them a chance to express themselves too.
- Do remember special dates in your significant other’s life, this shows seriousness and also creates trust between the two of you.
How comfortable you're with your partner determines how open you will be with each other. If you are not comfortable in telling or sharing things with your partner, what are you still doing in the relationship?
To achieve this you must put the following into considerations.
- Do try and be free with your significant other.
- Don't try to hide your feelings from them.
- Do learn to share.
- Do tell them about your day.
- Don't try to rub it in their face that you're having more fun than they are.
- Don't ever hide a bad day from them, though they might not be of any help but they are still important enough to know whats going on in your life.
6. Surprise them as often as you can.
Put on your best act, it doesn't need that much of a skill to surprise someone. How?
Things to keep in mind always:
- Show up unexpected to their work place.
- Show up to their birthdays bearing gifts of course.
- Always remind them of how important they are to you by celebrating them.
- Show little acts of love that reminds them why they fell in love with you in the first place.
Things to keep in mind always:
- Know that all kinds of love requires efforts.
- Always treat your partner how you want to be treated.
- Stay in touch as much as possible but try not to 'suffocate' your partner because though distance makes the heart grow fonder, too much presence doesn't.
- Surprise them as often as you can.
- Learn to show some little acts of love from time to time.
- Never give them a reason to doubt you for one day, though no one is perfect but every body knows the right from wrong.